


Riding In Cars With Strange Boys

by colisahotnorthernmess



Category: Big Fat Quiz of the Year RPF, British Comedy RPF
Genre: Brief Touches, Drunkenness, Ficlet, First Time, Longing, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-19
Updated: 2018-05-19
Packaged: 2019-05-09 02:19:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 792
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14707250
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/colisahotnorthernmess/pseuds/colisahotnorthernmess
Summary: Alan can't remember whether he booked a cab - he's far too drunk to know or even care - but it's cold and Jack would never leave him out here all alone. There's something of a bond between them and Jack knows it. If only he could open up. Set after the Big Fat Anniversary Quiz in 2007.





	Riding In Cars With Strange Boys

**Author's Note:**

> Old fic. Posted in 2007 to Livejournal.

"Do you need a lift anywhere?" Mr. Dee turned the corner to find someone staggering, a pair of manclogs hung from one hand, propped against a 'give way' post that was so wobbly, it looked like it was trying to live up to its name. The triangular arrow pointed downwards in shame. The man was drunk. And, from his inebriated state, that feminine gait, he was _unmistakable -_ even when shouting, barefoot, and trying to hail down every car in the vicinity as if it were a cab. It might have only been ten o'clock, but given Jack's past, he was no-one to judge someone for drinking early.

"My taxi didn't come. I'm so pissed I can't remember if I booked it," Alan's frown turned into giggles as he stumbled, fell onto his friend's shoulder and landed far closer to him than he had realised.

But Jack's face didn't change. "Mine'll be along any minute," he said.

"You're only too kind, deary," the younger man gave a toothy grin, before shivering and shrinking into himself. He snivelled, pushing up his foggy glasses, the frosted condensation making it rather difficult to tell who his benefactor actually _was_. That _and_ the double-vision - but all _that_ meant was, that after cleaning a splodge on the lens, he ended up with _two_ handsome Jacks instead of _one_. "Oh God, I don't know where I've left my cardi," he threw in a hint.  
  
"You must be freezing." It had paid off, as Jack hurriedly took off his winter coat. "Have my jacket." He watched as the comic minced towards him, partly due to the shale stuck in his soles, and also because he was just _Alan_. Unsteady on his feet, the pair ended up colliding again.

"Thank you," he replied.

Jack smiled, ever the gentleman. And that was when he saw them - the gold and silver foils still stuffed into Alan's shirt. They had been playing Channel 4's Big Fat Anniversary Quiz, and Carr, the competitor that he was, had dived for those in true Crystal Maze style. For some reason he'd kept them. Had he forgotten to take them out? Or did he think a bit of bling might improve his look? "Come here," he reached into the shirt without thinking, accidentally grabbing Alan and holding him close. He'd caught himself red-handed in the arms of another man and, before he could speak, the two of them were sharing a rather special moment. _Damn._

"It's here," the camp comedian quietly announced, in a bid to change the subject. But it would hardly help their conversation along now. They sat apart on the journey home, Carr to one side of the back seat and Dee to the other. The awkwardness eventually broke, a fair few minutes later, with, "I think this is your stop."  
  
Brushing against the side of the curb, the taxi arrived outside the first house, with a giddy man stupidly opening the door early and almost dropping out onto the road. Despite his wallet half-hanging out of his trousers already, as he reached behind him trying to grasp it in order to pay the cabbie, Alan _wouldn't_ be paying for the trip. This time it was on Jack.

"Shame you can't come back with me," Carr smiled to himself, "I would've liked to have seen whether you really _are_ grumpy without your sex in a morning. _Oh_ , and your tea and toast, of course..." But Jack just sat there, in silence and heavy breaths. The less he heard of this would spare his blushes. Soon only he and the driver remained in the car - and the resonance of the wide, black door being slammed was just a quiet ringing in his ears.

He observed the notices - 'no smoking', etc - _anything_ for a distraction - and he peeled the corner away from some sort of warning. He was far too tired to read it and the small print blurred as he tried. Knowing his luck, the message would have been informing him of a fine for _tampering_ with the sign. All he could see were that the stickers and plastic plaques seemed to be saying one thing - 'go after him,' they screamed. He crossed his legs to the other side, and turned away. Until he could ignore them no longer.  
  
"Actually," he leaned forward to the chap in the front seat, "I think I might get out here." He waited for the vehicle to grind to a slow and definite halt. Lifting a twenty pound note out of brand-new trousers - too clean, too tight, practically pleading to be ripped off by a certain  _someone_ \- he then added, "Yeah, I think I'll need the exercise to walk off tomorrow's breakfast - if I don't get it in the meantime..."

**Author's Note:**

> Please note that this is a work of fiction - it is a completely made-up fantasy and is in no way intended to cause offence to the public figures involved.


End file.
